i woke up to her playing with my penis. just wiggling it around and around. awkward night? i would say so.
It's too hard to jack off and hold an ipad at the same time
i just remembered last night waiting for you to pick me up wearing my bra on my head to protect me from the rain
They're calling for 20 inches of snow but I'll have a dirtbike for emergency trips to the liquor store. Even if I crash it won't hurt.
You would not believe how incredibly hard it is to climb on top of a three story apartment buildings roof from the air conditioning unit
We're trying to see who can drink the most and still be eligible to donate blood tomorrow.
I just spent the last ten minutes making a timeline of my sex life. 2010 and 2011 I am calling "I can't believe Im still clean" years.
You better fuck one or both of those bitches and bring me pictures that will make me uncomfortable
I can do at least one of those things.
Still losing my voice, so I am trying to get it back through drugs. Welcome to my Monday logic.
We did it in the bathroom in Taco Bell. We didn't buy anything before we left, which I thought was rude.
He turned me into a screamer. Guess I'm really not a lesbian.
Dude if you're not gonna answer them I'm gonna stop snapchatting you my hook ups
You know I love you. I just don't love your penis.
I pulled up iMessage on my computer and I'm pretty sure two people in my class saw that dick pic you sent. Sorry!
it's 1:30pm and i'm eating cheese while i sext. i need hobbies
Randomize