I wish my penis had an off switch
ashley and jimmy are about to have sex on degrassi.... EVERYONES GETTING LAID BUT ME
That bus ride was like a tour of all the bushes I puked behind last night
im trying to stop thinking of him and his amazing dick. every time i do i snap myself with a rubber band. classical conditioning at its finest...and you said i wouldnt learn anything from psychology.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just saw two dudes run across the street carrying a mini keg and a scaled model of the empire state building. Missed this town
I AM HAVING A WEIRD OUT OF BODY EXPERIENCE. IN CAPS LOCK.
why the fuck are my pubes caked with bread crumbs?
Ill give you a 4 hour blow job if you make my nephew go to bed.
Prepare for tons of dick. I mean dick by the bucket loads. Waterfalls if cock.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You called me and said "Aidan's unconscious" to which he said "I'm conscious, I'm conscious pilot"
He was filled with the holy spirit. And vodka.
I went home with a guy last night because he showed me some magic tricks and kept shouting "THEY'RE ILLUSIONS MICHAEL!"
I'm high and dancing to practical magic. Your needs for my penis can wait.
you know she was a bad idea when your mom offers to pay for an eHarmony account
We took a walk on the beach after the bar, he held my hand and kissed me. And then I peed under a lifeguard stand. It was so romantic.
Someone fucked a stripper in their rental car, there is goddamn glitter everywhere.
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