Ugh, here's a dating tip. Hairy legs are a major turn off
Dude, I think my check liver light just came on
This guy just walked into class and first thing he did was grab the garbage can, walk to his desk and say "just in case"
The drugs are starting to wear off. Suddenly aware there's a girl with bald patches and 2 guys that don't have a full set of teeth between them.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
drunk guy next to me on the train just tried to share his pizza with me
he just tried to feed it to me...i love new york
you called me in the middle of the night, wandering the streets, in search of "the ultimate burrito"
Seriously, dude... You knows its bad when you gag on her nipple.
Also I think I'm starting to get calluses on my hands from my level of sexual activity
Just had hot animal sex with the guy who had been sending me 10 second selfie snapchats for the past month
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sex obviously provides more sustenance than oatmeal.
every time someone would wish me happy birthday I would be like "thanks happy birthday to you too"
I just had to close my blinds so my neighbors wouldn't see me drinking a beer at 9 am. GO CHIEFS!
Carver called his mom a milf again
Was it on purpose this time?
She gave me a boner for the first time in 9 years.
while giving me head, she stopped, looked up at me smiling and said "ill never be able to look at bananas the same way again" and then went back to work.
Randomize