Dude why does my asshole itch so bad?
I'll teach you how to wipe better
god, a vagina is an amazing trump card
she told me she was pregnant in a never have i ever game
Stripper fight on main stage. It just happened. And it was glorious.
By midnight I was dipping doritos in frosting...that's how my simmer break diet is going.
ALL CAPS CUZ ITS SERIOUS SHAME.
This girl just swallowed a pealed banana whole. I'm not worthy.
well, the drug dealer I've been fucking the past 5 months gave me a chilis gift card for Christmas, so things are looking up.
My blowjobs put them in a state of relaxation similar to that of getting hit with a tranquilizer. The fear comes after the sex.
CHEMICAL ENGINEER. God my mom would be so proud of me.
Dude. Her vagina is a blender.
I think I won over his best friend. He was staring at my boobs all night.
telling her she was ovary-acting wasn't the greatest idea. doing it in a text so she could see your spelling was where you really went wrong, though.
that's where you went wrong. never assume I'm adult enough to do something on my own.
She flashed them and they let her pay with Monopoly money. I'm married, so it is your obligation as my best man to repeatedly fuck her for me
Randomize