love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
O.A.R does not stand for Old Recycled Abortions.
After he came he asked what I was doing for thanksgiving.
I'm sure that's not what the inventers of the Turkey baster had in mind, but that's what I had in mine.
I had a dream that we erected a stage in our living room for "impromptu performances" how can we make this a reality?
"YOU ALWAYS BEEN A HOE YOU ALWAYS GONE BE A HOE. THAT'S JUST THE WAY IT'S GONE BE." overheard at temple
! asked the random counter guy from 7/11 for Percocet. he immediately called his hookup
new dating motto: let your guard down, not your panties
Well puke fest 2014 just happened
The best part about daylight savings time this weekend is we get an extra hour to be fucked up.
Congrats. You made me have an orgasm in Starbucks.
So she was on top of my phone and somehow called my roommate while I banged her. I picked up and he congratulated me. I was with his sister. I will take this to my grave.
Is it sad to eat a candy bra by yourself?
i don't know what it is about you being around kids that makes me want to screw your brains out
That is the creepiest and also the sexist thing you've ever said
i think it's like a sexual celebration of not having kids
Holy. Shit. I just remembered all the lapdances....
Randomize
