mmm... i enjoy making beautiful women smile
I am full of burrito and curiosity
some guy just walked up to the bench i was on, backflipped off of it, gave me his number and walked away....i love this city
she just totaled her parents new car because there was a bee in the car. So she crashed into a light pole to kill it.
they came at us with fireworks while we were skinny dipping in her jacuzzi at 4 am...
He yelled out my full name in bed...I felt like I was being scolded.
There is ecstasy everywhere. Get over here right no5w. The 5 is silent.
Shit stained towel. The very symbol of how much closer we are as friends. Fall 011... beautiful disaster
let's see, i ended up walking for an hour towards a macdonalds that didnt exist, sprinted full tilt into a powerline, and left a 30 dollar tip to a waitress at dennys we made friends with. I REGRET NOTHING
did i send you the picture of me smiling with the magnum wrapper?
Either im tripping real hard, or there's a legit land shark in my apartment.
i want to go make food but i'll have to face my mom after telling her that the random i'm sleeping with, whose name i don't know, told me I was "too slutty to be his girlfriend" when i was drunk last night
it's the amount of time you spend on preventing me from puking that really cements this friendship
A 3am FaceTime to go to IHOP is the closest thing to a bootycall that I'm getting
you said something about joining a k-pop band before passing out topless on the trampoline.
Randomize
