it's not the walk of shame if you do it in cowboy boots.
there is this woman at the counter who looks identical to linda ellerbee. and she's grinning. COME. INSIDE. NOW.
I think she just tried to waterboard me with her vagina.
Acid is not a monday night drug
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just threw up in airport security. Happy holidays.
I wish straight boys touched me the way gay boys do.
FYI, when you wake up, please note that I puked in your shoes because I sstubbed my tooee, not becus I was drunk.
he told me that my best friend was "one the most attractive people he's ever seen" and wondered why he didn't get a blow job
i climbed out of the bath tub this morning and found him taped to the treadmill
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Speaking of ejaculate, did you get the side of your car cleaned off?
You just sat there and yelled "I JUST WANT TO RUB MY NIPPLES"
Your cock is gonna weep like a baby
I'm good. We walked you back to my apartment and you demanded to eat the sandwich I made for him
We need to step in, this can't continue. The guy she went home with last night looked exactly like Count Olaf, right down to the unibrow.
Which version tho, Jim Carrey or Neil Patrick Harris?
THAT DOESN'T FUCKING MATTER, YOU DON'T FUCK COUNT OLAF!!!
Why does my nose taste spicy?
How do you know what your nose tastes like?
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