I love that she's always that person who people think it's a good idea to invite her to something. and then she's there and you realize, "nope."
i'm in workout clothes. this is progress.
he used his one phone call on me and it said "you have a collect call from- LETS GET IT- at the montgomery county jail".
soo how bad was i last night?
licking sour cream off of the table at pancheros bad.
Someone just bought me a one liter long island and call me maybe is on. I'm going to die
I'm sorry, our booty call lines closed at 2 am. If you are receiving this message it is our off hours. Please try again between the hours of 12pm and 2 am to reschedule your booty call. Thank you for your cooperation.
cassie wtf are you alive??! no one has seen you for like seven hours whereeee did you go
IS IT POSSIBLE FOR A GUY TO NOT HAVE BALLS
You don't understand. This could be the last time I shave a star into my vag. Get over here.
You just kept yelling and saying, "IM NOT GOING TO STOP YELLING UNTIL YOU TAKE THAT SHOT"
I have been drunk every time I've gone to mexico. I do not remember mexico.
the second she challenged me to mario kart drinking game i knew i was in love
I loaned him a tie and then had to tie it for him. I'm like his weird lesbian girlfriend.
Sooo i'm debating posing nude for the drawing and painting classes, I just wanna see if they draw my nip ring.
First non virgin Sunday. Bursts into flames.
I seriously just had to blow dry my thong.
Randomize
