his prince albert piercing just severely cut the roof of my mouth. can you pick me up at the hospital if he drops me off?
i would totally change schools right now just to be that new girl everyone wants
who paints a picture of their own dick and sends it to people. i dont know if its borderline crazy or just fucking genius...
I just saw a girl on crutches doing a walk of shame. She is either super dedicated, or her night didn't go as planned.
I came in your room, you looked at me and said "I fucked up" and then some kid showed up and took you to the hospital
Whoever owns the butter that i always steal out of the office fridge definitely put THC butter in there this time. Shit just got real.
Let me get this straight, you're telling me to lower my standards? Even though last week you told me I don't have any..?
I hope one day I make out with someone in a taco truck :(
I'm glad I inspire you to reach for the stars
Or a taco
Literally just inhaled three cinnamon rolls. Sara is staring. It was inhuman
I feel violated by Miley Cirrus's performance in the VMA's.
He's a Republican and an Ohio State fan idk how far this can go.
I literally am filling up a victoria's secret bag with stuff that would give my parents a heart attack to hide in my roommates' room. This is being an adult when parents visit
i just found a lighter in my bra... from last night, and its 7:43pm...
I just found an old slice of LIME in my wallet?????????
Dear god my vagina.
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