she was so not down for the gang bang
those bitches were sniggering at my man-pris like they were goddesses of fashion!
...dude i pray you are quoting something, someone, anyone...
you have to choose: penises or morals?
You were spooning my trash can and I had to crumble cookies on the floor by your face to get you to eat
I just found puke in my bra..
It was just a reflex. BOOM I kicked her in the face
Ok, gonna go sleep cuz my brain wants to be smart and not follow my pussy into the danger zone
So it finally happened last night... I re-met someone that i've already had sex with. Had no idea who he was. Fantastic
My mom just found my nipple clamps...... oh God why....
I climaxed at the same time the bass dropped. I think it's safe to say I've reached enlightenment
Whatcha doing tonight? Reply TURNUP if you are drinking, or STOP to cancel messages
My intervention, when it happens, should have vanilla cake....buttermilk icing.
My favorite part was when you kept telling everyone you were being "green" by drinking straight out of the bottle so u weren't wasting a cup.
You’re like one of those doomsday preppers, but for your vagina
Like sorry your dick won’t suck itself?
Randomize
