we were having sex in the bathroom when his aunt knocked on the door
and rather than go out and meet her, i climbed out the window. so now she thinks he was masturbating and moaning his own name in a really girly voice
I had a dream last night that I had to pretend I liked Dave Matthews Band to impress this girl I was talking to.
I guess it was more of a nightmare.
He wouldnt get hard, then started talking about his ex wife. I literally rolled over and started to cry
just smoked a blunt while listening to nsync. i now know what my childhood was missing.
He booked us a hotel at a resort in cancun for sprng break... I just wanted to get laid this weekend when i was blackout i didnt know it was gonna spiral into a mess of events like a 5 month in advance commitment
Good thing it was his birthday because I accidentally grabbed his dick at the bar. A lot.
When I was with you my penis felt like a fat woman crammed into a pair of lulu lemons
My high school reunion is Thursday so I need to find an outfit that says "Haha, you got fat and I got tits. Suck it, bitches."
he didn't stitch me up last time. in fact, he yelled at me for bleeding.
You're right, I'd say my real all time low was when I let that fifteen-year-old feel my boob.
How do I convince my friend not to get tattoo tributes to her cats?
WHO DOES THAT
I told her it'd send up tons of red flags and she responded by telling me they're her babies. And she's sober.
I cannot believe I accepted his penis into my body.
What are you gunna do with your life today
put it back together
He is saved in her phone as Sir. Mindfuck <3/ vag cleaner of course I need to meet him.
If it makes you feel better he's in the stall next to me and I'm taking a diabolical shit. He's complaining
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