Did u get laid? I went and bought lube and fleshlighted it while moaning ur name the whole time.
the vast amounts of cleavage i'm sporting to my final says "no, I didn't study but don't worry I've got something lined up for when I don't graduate".
there's just a random girl here singing about how much she loves fiber
he said verbatim, he wants to "bang you hard".
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Shots. Renamed a guy (he looked like a Scott to me), running, bloody Marys, walk to Safeway, donuts, ride home from someones husband, Nurse Jackie. FIN.
you are never too drunk for berry picking
Number of twigs I found in my hair: 5
Hahah what did you even say to him?!
That I was gonna inflate his vagina with a leaf blower?
Oh.
He walked in at 7am saying that the police had his shoes and phone because he's being investigated for attempted auto theft.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's not ok to announce to a group of people playing beer pong that a girl put her finger in your butt last night. I now know this
My night started to turn around the time I started calling her a "raggedy cunt".
Somehow she got that I meant it as a term of endearment.
You said you were uncomfortable with your body and then you started making whale noises
im too broke to be in a relationship this close to the holidays
No. I'm sorry but once your "would go gay for" list exceeds five people, you're bi. Get over it.
Hope you’re getting action boo.
Definitely no. I woke up next to a bag of McDonald's.
Randomize