can you sing with all the voices of the mountain? can you paint with al the colors of the windddd
wasted?
im pocohantasssss
she gave up head for lent, but she said sex was still fair game
sometimes i think i'm bisexual but then i realize the only girl i'm attracted to is myself.
Did I hear correctly when it sounded like he said "just don't let me throw up into your vaj?"
You threw up on yourself, then proceeded to tell us "to not make a mess in your car"
This is like a relationship, I expect to be mind blown at least once a week.
We got out of the car in valet drinking beers we gave the valet one as a tip
I like to play this game where I try to reach orgasm before my bathtub overflows....lost tonight.
Why did you just send me a picture of your dinner?
CAUSE LOOK HOW MUCH SPAGHETTI I'M EATING
I tried to break it off with the married one. He offered to pay off my car.
The side bitch struggle is real.
Just read the 12 signs you're a horrible roommate post and fucking in your roommate's bed wasn't on the list, so I'm a pretty awesome roommate.
Sorry for cyberstalking your dad.
Did I wash my face last night at your house? Where did my eyebrows go??
you poured beer in your mouth so you could be a beer pong cup for her to drink out of/make out with
Did it work?
Get over here and bring your drill!!! The strippers next door need help installing a stripper pole by their pool
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