Meet me at the corner of "what the fuck" and"how'd you get in my bed" in 10 minutes.
So I thought the party was crazy before his pinky came off...
It's a toss up. They'll either laugh and watch you drunkenly fuck on the beach or they'll throw you deep in Mexican jail.
She's on her way over to shave my year round sweater vest into a festive argyle sweater vest. Keeper?
those kids just got delivered to the party by the pizza guy
after giving head I just always feel like I need like. ice cream. as both a means of getting the lingering sperm out of my mouth, and a congratulations.
We tried the hang n bang, remember? You ruined it by crying and telling me you loved me while blowing me.
I'm getting a collar when he gets back in to town! That's like the bdsm equivalent of getting his class ring!
high moment I think I just reached personal nirvana
They are going to name an STD after you.
I'm gonna snort this pill I found on the ground cause that's how classy I am. Watch football and eat Beef jerky. Domesticated at its finest.
BITCH I AM EXPERIENCING THE FEMININE MYSTERY SHUT UP AND GIVE ME DRUGS
DIBS on your mom for my beer pong partner.
She said she didn't care that I was gay and wants to ride the fucking rainbow
Put down the Captain Crunch and get over here. It’s a dickfest!!
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