I just saw a girl make a shank with the underwire in her bra...
no really all good couples have similar hair colors!
after the first blizzard, i went out and bought a thirty and put it in a cooler and hid it out in the backyard. now the second blizzard has deposited 2 feet of snow on top of said cooler. there is a shovel and treasure map over here waiting for you
Considering he believes im part of the 2016 us curling team id say hes pretty drunk
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
why oh why did i suck thise tits. nothing but trouble fuuuuuu
I just blurted out "it's pretty tight isn't it"
He offered to teach me how hula hoop in exchange for acid. I took him up on it.
I just got back to our room ....neither of us spent the night there but both our beds are occupied. send help.
Things are very odd on my 29th hour of being awake. Thought there was a bird in my lecture hall and it was just a girl putting up her hair. What even
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Alls I wanted was a fun New Years but I end up fingering a geico sales representative on a futon and giving her a ride to work the next morning
You then played what you called "a smooth jazz rendition of talk dirty to me" all thrusting your crotch at the bartender. Mom looked horrified, but my dad couldn't stop laughing
I refuse to go to a doctor for a sex injury, not when I've come so far already
If we hadn't just agreed to no commitment, i'd totally propose right now. Best. Fuckbuddy. Ever.
Periods are much less exciting when you're not sexually active.
They were shocked that I could handle my liquor so well. I'm half Irish and half Russian. This is what I'm made for
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