We need to talk in the morning. The guy I was with just interpreted me taking off my earrings as code for "let me take off my pants."
under NO circumstances is it acceptable to fist pump to taylor swift
i'm pretty sure the only people calling it "sexting" are ones who don't actually do it
okay, I promise to stop paying strippers to hit you
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Lesson learned. Never get fingered on an airplane.
You better not fucking die before we have sex while you blow fire. I'm serious. Don't mess up my sexual bucket list.
before the moonshine you were already braiding the bouncers beard -_-
well apparently i was just calling everyone cunts. then i awoke from my blackout to 3 very mad roommates who didn't bring a key out with them
It takes a special friend to go vibrator shopping with
Yes. It does.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I tried to order champagne at IHOP last night
My boyfriend told me that I said I wanted to "feast on her vagina"... Glad I don't remember.
so hungover i had to get off the train to puke, rallied and went to work. not sure if that's an adulting win or fail
Rebounding with her sister was the best idea i ever had.
we bonded over knowing every word to freaky gurl by gucci mane so it’s kinda starting to make sense why I gave him head in his cul de sac
was that you i just saw walking down the street in only one heel smoking a cig yelling "hello sexuals" to everyone who passed??
HELLLLLO SEXUAL BEING
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