He tried to blame not having a condom on the economy.
I had a dream last night, there was a gumball machine that was filled with Oxycontin. I would try to get some but got vitamins instead. I was so frustrated!! woke up angry.
Somehow he came on his own face...then he freaked out
ONE NIGHT STAND. You have 27 minutes before the offer expires, so I suggest you hurry.
Some great men died of syphilis. I accept your compliment.
Explain to me how it was that you spent the entire night playing pool with three lesbians and did not get a foursome out of it.
he walkred up to the manager at dennys and said 'look, my friends passed out in your bathroom, can i go get her?'
making out was so insane. it felt like our tongues were paintbrushes made of waves and we were painting an ocean galazy
She screamed at us, "You guys need to wake up and smell the beer-bong!"
Found a piece of twizzler in my buttcrack.
Come help me clean and have sexual intercourse with me
Bring breadsticks
I found it. now I'm going to the gym to be "healthy" or whatever that folklore is called.
My legacy here is being that tiny blonde girl that threw someone down and shouted "Fuck your face, I'm Dee Dee Ramone."
Lol I'm just saying its too early for your penis, I can accept it but at a more decent hour
I'll pick u up. I have to buy a new sofa cover anyway. I swear I've never seem a girl cum like that before.
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