I kind of had a moment like that kid whose mom cancelled his WoW subscription, except I didn't try to shove a remote control up my own ass.
my dad just referred to me and my boobs as 'the three of you'
The good news is the bleeding stopped. I think I'm going to sober up before I tell you the bad news though.
Somehow she slept thru the vacuuming, people walking in and out, and the sound of constant beer bottles hitting the trash, but when someone said weed in a regular volume of voice she startled awake.
I'm such a fucking super-fan. I was worried his cum would wash away his autograph.
Ok, it is technically a gay bar but it's a total dive w/ strong drinks. The important thing is you can start drinking at 11:00 am without judgement
oh oh oh, and apparently you can bring in your own snacks. Some old dude just gave me cashews and cheetos.
My meds have diminished my sex drive, this must be what regular women feel like
I should start wearing my Batman shirt more often when I drink. Good things happen. All sorts of shit.
I am a figure skater. You should know better than to let me get drunk near any patches of ice during Olympics season.
But did u die
I found an onion in my purse
I woke up at 3am, top off, with campus security telling me to get dressed. Tonight was a GOOD NIGHT
the cop said "drunk and disorderly" like it was a bad thing
90% sure I just sold adderall to my professor
100% proud
I have mastered the art of having sex on monkey bars.
No I feel the same as usual. Mopey with a chance of bitch fits.
Randomize
