when she started arguing that Girl Talk was in fact a DJ, i knew i could never sleep with her
how can i change my meal plan to a keystone plan?
oh fat girl friday strikes again...
We were sexting and at the end, instead of us having sex, he decided to put "we fell asleep in each others arms."
i think you broke pat's ankle when you drove over it... he's freaking out but on a more serious note i'm 99% sure i saw a werewolf
I don't know what he sees in her. All I see are horrible pancake nipples
theres still like 7 beers in the gutter from the roof party we had last night. i dont know how we got up there. but we need to get those beers down.
Who topped off the "random beer mix" beer bong with a pinch of pepper?? All you could taste was busch and pepper...
Why can't I hire someone to teach me how to be a decent human being?
I just want to be like i dont know you but ive seen your penis & i like it
just give up on your dreams and come get shit house drunk with me.
How drunk are you?
Completed.
Oh god establish a safe word
I'm going to! Pineapple.
And I hope you're not misinterpreting us fucking as me trying to win you back. The sex is good and girls have needs.
We found you with your penis in the vacum hose crying softly...
Randomize
