There was a point where some of my friends attempted 'moi's', which stands for makeout on introduction.
It involved going up to women and very aggressively trying to make out with them upon meeting them
Surprisingly the success rate was exceedingly high
You think ghandi was good in the sack? cuz i sure do.
I'm not gay.
Soooo you want ghandi? is that what your telling me?
If ghandi gives good head...I'm in
Its fine.
Apparently when he woke up I was tripping my face off. Everytime the cat meowed I would meow back. This went on for several hours.
The crazy thing is, I dont actually know where the cat is, she said something bout the back of the toilet and a sock.
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she kept peeing on everything and yelling it was now her property.
Girl walking by was talking on the phone about how he needed to write a gratitude list in her letter to god this week. Too stoned
Why is the word 'best' written on my chest?!!
If I asked you to guess what I'm doing right now how many guesses would it take to get to really high eating an apple bumping techno
I never actually go in the club. I get in line, hit on a chick, and convince her to come drink all she wants for free at my house.
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Signs of a stoner: trying everything in your fridge topped with peanut butter to seek satisfaction.
You only have to pretend to care about soccer until July. HE'S PRETTY DONT RUIN THIS.
I did cocaine with my cab driver all night. It was the best date.
Tbh you just need to fuck it out like I don't know another solution
Also I just took the BEST ass selfie of my adult life.... it's gonna be a good day haha
Okay, let's just all take a step back and think about how funny this will seem in like a year... Maybe 2 if his nose is actually broken.
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