I walked up to her and said hello and wanted to ask her if she had fun last night... she asked me if we had met before.
were not allowed back there because i puked on the waitresses foot while trying to order another round. for myself.
apparently it's okay for him to stick his dick in my mouth but not to let me have a can of diet pepsi for the road.
Do you think when graham bell invented the phone he ever thought that people would be using them to facebook on the shitter?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I wish they made portable blow up dolls for girls.
It's called a dildo, genius. Go to sleep.
hah yeah. there was a kid puking in the bathroom and this idiot brings in a potted plant and was like "yeah he's like, not getting enough oxygen"
well we are all hammered and my parents are reminiscing about all the times they drove us home drunk from Christmas
I'm currently witnessing my drunk neighbor attempting to fold laundry on his front lawn. I think he's trying to spell out HELP.
the fog machine set off the whole complexes fire alarm
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
it was fucking weird. cops showed up but they appreciated our 3 story bong. and then some girl tried to steal our cheese and butter
You both ran and jumped into the tub yelling Jamaican bobsled team
Not at all! I'll let your potential employer know you have a huge dick
He took off all my clothes, fingered me, than said "would you be more comfortable if I was naked too?"
I was running because his wife invited me to join them on their kinky Vegas weekend. Crossing state lines is too much commitment for me.
Of course my parents remember you. You showed them your tits
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