I just had sex in the back of an ambulance. Call me.
My recently uploaded pictures to facebook: Me partying on Beale St. with a single girl on each arm. Ex's recently upload pictures: Several pictures of cats. I win.
Just farted in public and tried to sniff it all up before anyone noticed...do you think that actually works?
Um don't talk to me about fat. I just used my chip bag to cover up all my candy wrappers in the garbage.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I need a pic of your cock for our cock collage
he made a bald eagle out of coke lines
I have blocked the memory from my mind. He is just a fuzzy cloud floating with my other bad decisions..
Im drunk with people I love less than you. fix it.
I seriously think the toilet is the cleanest thing in their house. At least if I have to worry its not about that.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We dropped so many bottles they would only give us plastic cups. We actually drank ourselves back to preschool.
I'll pay you to write the paper but not for sex. You should only get paid for something you work hard at.
while i am personally glad that we met...i feel like for society as a whole it was a bad thing
This Christmas I would like to thank Jesus for cocaine.
Hey can you explain why there's a dissected coconut in my purse????
We have ur drink. Mom passed out in the bathroom. I'm goin to the other bathroom. Bs at the top of the stairs on way outside.
Randomize