God help me. Come pick me up. The guy told me this is not a hotel and i had to leave.
so she asking me "is it okay to have dangling labias?"
I told him I had my daily dose of vitamin c so i wouldn't blow him
I decided that not getting a job after college is gods way of telling me I will make a great housewife
it's gonna be a chat room kind of night
He tried. I said no. He said, "It's ok if I do this?" and proceeded to jerk himself off. Oh, the French.
the girl i fucked last night woke up this morning, disoriented and looked at me, and said "oh, you're hot." and went back to sleep.
We eventually had to ration the melon vodka. 10 pushups per shot. THATS why my arms hurt
No she stopped screaming. Now she's eating popcorn. Off a plate. With a spoon.
there are teeth marks in the soap. why are there teeth marks in the soap.
Once he blows his load, he's more of an immediate flight risk than that jetBlue pilot. He's out the door before his cum is out of my vajayjay.
Lesson: Never rollerskate with a 40 in your hand unless you have a destination.
In the mean time, I'll continue to kick ass at running and become a successful stripper while he might hook up with one average looking girl he met at a club. I so win.
The problem with having a roommate is that you are forced to answer the age old question "Are you okay?"
Dude, I can't even reach my asshole to wipe it. I have a lot more to be thankful for this Thanksgiving.
I can't help you there
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