we ran out of wine so you tried to make some by throwing grapes and nail polish remover in a blender.
The panties match.
I'll be right there.
apparently they wrote a song entitled "butt slut" about her... im thinking shes not girlfriend material.
It's like playing clue with my own life. I have to piece together what I did, where I was, how I did it, and who I did it to
there are people swimming in the fountain next to the library... hello senior week
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
Any man who has a face like that and a bike, deserves a vagina like yours permanently.
I don't think tequila will soothe the spots where my tonsils used to be.
My very favorite thing in the whole world is when guys try to booty call her as I'm fucking her. Sucks to suck.
We don't know where he is but he left his pants and what appears to be a tooth here so he's gotta come back sometime
IM TRYING TO SAY GOODNIGHT STOP FOR LIKE FIVE SECONDS WITH THE DICK SUCKING
i tried to break up pigeon sex because one looked too young to consent. fireball feminism ftw
Hey you're my best friend, I'm sorry I picked my vagina over my heart last night.
Dude I used amphetamines responsibly today though. I snorted one in the am for work and then chewed one in the pm for other work. I'm an adult.
If I could figure out how to do him with his wranglers on you would never see me again.
Randomize
