yo i stole a wine glass from the ritz but i spilled wine on my hundo dolla shirt
And hes hitting me with his balls, really hard.
if hell is full of stilettos, fake tans, bleached hair, overused make-up, drawn out s's and blatent bitchiness, then i'm in hell right now.
Lol welcome to greek life
Housing is going to charge us for any broken dishes/glassware. Steal as many glasses as you can from the bars tonight. I got the baking dish and 3 plates covered.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The night was going well until I found tufts of my hair in the freezer. Then I got nervous
He gets a blow job; I get my oil changed free of charge. And that way I only see him every 2500 miles.
Let's just say that watching the sunrise in a space helmet is really the only way to do it.
ur not supposed to find someone to make out with when ur bf takes u to his SISTERS house to hang out with her and her husband
I think they make you graduate because you get too old to go hard and become a risk. homecoming weekend wins again. fuck.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I drew a giraffe.. But she did say that bumped that test up from a 39 to a 40. It's the little things.
The bad news is I fucked my exes girlfriend. The good news is I100% understand why he left me
Tonight I plan on passing out fully clothed on the table. I don't know where normal people plan on sleeping.
Why can't you just be normal and get dick pics from your exes like everyone else?
Look, road flare archery was agreed on. We both accepted it was a shit idea sober, but did it drunk anyway.
when i saw him today i think my vagina did the equivalent of a stomach growl... its been to long
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