Hey I don't know if you will get this but all I know is you are so beautiful to .ee and? I dare anyone to stop me me from caring for you ante so beautiful so I kid you not gorgeous iyoiu are so beautiful to me i dare som.eone too stioo you
dude i woke up laying next to some guy. i dont have my bra or his name. he has a nice tv though.
so i woke up with ketchup and a sticky boob on my face...this is a new low
We're watching an ocean show on Discovery Channel and drinking every time they say "dolphins." PS. Seals kill birds. Tell all your friends.
Saved 180 Bucks tonight. Pulled my own tooth. More money to party with.
Dude, she uses Old Spice. It smelled like I was eating out my grandfather.
Apparently we had sex last night, and then I made him drive me to the beach so I could puke in the ocean.
Absence makes the cock grow harder.
I just saw a black chick with an eyepatch. This is a once in a lifetime opportunity.
I am tired of banking on my penis size to overcome my lack of game.
Can you please help mom and dad? Theyre trying to figure out Skype, and its like 2 cavemen finding fire.
Ran into my statistics professor at the bar, he chugged a car bomb and yelled "x bar mothfucker!". On average I'm loving this PhD program.
We watched Purple Rain and then proceeded to have sex while listening to the album. If that's not exactly how Prince would want people to honor him, I don't know what is
I did a trust fall off the bar and then almost got into a knife fight over a push up competition. Just another Tuesday.
Don’t listen to me, I’m walking around wearing nothing but rave bracelets and headphones shouting “yeeeeaaahhhhhh”
Randomize
