Now would be a great time to stop wondering " Who let the dogs out" and go to sleep
He kept screaming "it's so seductive" while he was humping the wall
Just to be safe, you should be prepared to jump out of a second story window
You guys better make it up to the cabin in time for mud wrestling on Saturday. I'm not kidding. You know when I joke, and now is not one of those times.
please visit steve this weekend, he is getting mature and responsible and shit which scares me.
I tried to make friends with the geese living behind Hughes. They didn't really like that idea.
Are you high?
we probably should not get naked in my neighbor's garage again. just sayin
thanks for not telling him i named my trumpet after his dick
Also, even though this really sucks now, we will look back on this one day and laugh at the time we all got arrested on Thanksgiving
Legitimately sent a work email with "Hey, you kids, get off my lawn" as the subject line.
I guess I'm just gonna have to learn to live with the fact that I'm the guy who takes his pants off at the party and tries to start an orgy
She's passed out with a slice of pizza between her boobs should I just eat it and leave
currently working on a look that screams, "I'm dead inside, but still trying to enjoy the ride"
I wish I were single again so I could actually have sex.
i feel like if we ever had babies together they would just be drunk all the time
Randomize
