That's your vagina. No one goes out and burns it
Dude I just picked up a married chick while her husband was playing pool.
What do you mean you picked her up? How are you gonna leave the bar?
I didn't. I fucked her in the men's room. Come get me before he finds out.
He felt like a one man threesome
Just did lines off a tackle box. Love Montana.
This weekend is gunna be a fucking shitshow. I don't even wanna know how many dicks will end up inside of me
Currently smoking a blunt with my one night stand's mom. I don't know how I should feel about this.
I went down on her for 35 minutes and didn't even get a handy. I've never felt more desire to be gay in my life.
pretend your vagina is a choco taco and the guy is someone who really loves choco tacos. let him enjoy the choco taco.
I don't understand why you aren't on this trip all I do is smoke weed drink beer and get fingered
I think the worst was the guy who sent me YouTube videos about how age doesn't matter, and then a link for natural breast enhancements. Kill me.
I had a dream that my roommate walked in on me masturbating and I hissed "I'm not stopping this orgasm train for the likes of you" and just kept going
You know it's a good night when the word slut is imprinted on your ass and your hands smell like lube.
I think I must have activated my bat signal.... All three of my FWBs contacted me today!
I don’t mind that he’s uncircumcised. It’s the fact that he talks about the Bible immediately after we have sex .
Put on my pants to go to work and discovered they had melted.
Randomize
