May have finally hit rock bottom...bouncer from the strip club informed me I wore the same shirt last night
I wish i could go to google and type in drug dealers and it would bring up a number, a product and direction
I just put a picture of what I imagine Rob's dick looks like on it on my vision board. thank you Oprah!
did you fuck him yet?
hahaha who do you think your talking to.. a nun?
I left two hundred in singles in your car sorry about the mess
Just found out he cheated on me last night. But its Shark Week so I will deal with it next week.
So im guessing you dont remember the walk home, where you layed down in the alley and began to sing "threes company too" and when i told you to get up you had the nerve to tell me i was to drunk.
He had a joint rolled for us when he picked me up. It's how ASU does romance
I shouldn't be that hard, but i cant exactly put "a guy to tie me up and fuck me and then brush my hair" in my dating profile
Dude. I've never been with a guy who just wanted to go down on me all the time including while I'm shooting zombies on call of duty. My life is complete.
So I just sneezed blood everywhere. On the upside. After yesterday I feel way more confident AND I give even less of a fuck.
My TA is here with a sombrero and an entire bottle of Svedka. Skip jury duty.
I gave him a bj as a thank you for helping. I think that's good.
After the apocalypse all we'll have is vodka and twinkles.
Just saw the pics from the bachelor party. When the hell did we go to southie. And why was there a chicken in the limo..? You guys really are my best friends.
Randomize
