Wow so 15 missed calls, a vm AND a text saying come downstairs? ...And where is downstairs? Explain.
An ad on my facebook says "don't be THAT girl". Its like it knows.
i guess that's what happens when you find your girlfriend at the zoo
the blizzard started in kansas. im debating driving to a bar now so i can get snowed in there for the game
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
On the way home from Florida I threw up at the beginning border and ending border of 6 states. You win this year Spring Break.
if you were drunk and peed in your friend's washing maching, would you send an "i'm sorry" text or say nothing at all?
all hypothetical of course
This freshman just ran out of her seat in a 200 person lecture, opened the emergency door and vommed everywhere. Then quietly went back to her seat. $2 Pitchers hit someone hard last night.
I brought up my Bobbly Flay drinking game in the interview. Of course I got the job.
Just saw 1 guy dressed as a cow and another dressed as a shrimp dancing on the side of the road. We're turning around I NEED to dance with them.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm high and dancing to practical magic. Your needs for my penis can wait.
please come here right now, that girl who always gets her boob out is here and she brought taco bell
He caught a Pokemon on my head while I sucked him off. I think I need to marry him.
I love you. Go after that dick
Btw. I have a sinus infection from doing cocaine in a portapotty at a Duran Duran concert. So, gimme a couple of days before y'all start the party.
will a lunchtime blow job make it better?
Randomize