Fucking hipsters really piss me off man. They are just such punk as bitches, all of them. Oh, and fuck Ed Hardy too.
Don't use my boy Weezy to support your whoreish tendencies.
Ramen noodles and uncensored jerry springer episodes, what a nice life i have.
I told my rommate that he was pissing on his bed. He said "ok man" and took a step backwards and continued. He then went back to bed.
Remember when we were trying to guess how many people could fit in my shower? The answer is 7
my girlfriend just compared my daughters eyes to gollum from lord of the rings.
organizing the empties. That sober.
so i say "rick dont build that sandcastle" and he "says ok i wont" then i wake up and its sandcastle fucking city all over my apartment
But Monday we'll be living in a post-apocalyptic hellscape. Also, I'm going to a champagne tasting.
I don't want to be with anyone who doesn't accept me for who I am. eating cheeseburgers in bed is my favorite activity.
threw up on my 7.30 AM placement test. Never again
I know it I should, but it's kinda nice. It's smells like unbridled enthusiasm and copious amounts of melt your face off sex.
Thought I was doing makeup today for a photo shoot for a short film. WRONG. Try I'm on the set for a Fucking Sci-Fi PORN.
I'm trying to puke quietly so i don't ruin my grandma's birthday/my graduation brunch. And you say i need to grow up.
I gave myself a charlie horse masturbating this morning. I feel like that really set the tone for the day.
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