the girl next to me in class is drawing a guy banging a chick doggy style...its very detailed
you are getting stockholm syndrome from your pubes
I action rolled over a firepit. Twice. I am the action roll king
We're not on Beacon Street anymore so now your argument about not peeing on the sidewalk holds no water. Whereas my bladder has holded every water.
She slapped me in the face with a McDouble. Just threw it right at my face while I was driving... That is why we can't bring her out in public.
Showing up to Easter hungover, late, and covered in black an blues from pole dancing. Daughter of the year.
What if everything solid was made of oreos and everything liquid was wine
I just got chills
Two days later and my throat is still sore. That bong is a double edged sword.
no body wants to do anything today cause it's too cold, but a guy can only masturbate so many times a day. Ya know
she asked me to come back to her house where "hopefully her kids were asleep". that my friend is what i call a dealbreaker
Some guy is in my phone as Pat McAwesome.
Now go get drunk with your fam and get back into ur christmas groove. No time for gonnorhea
when i woke up with 300+ messages I didn't except them to be about coyotes and burning shoes.
There is a couple fucking in the outback bathroom and at first I thought it was sick but than I remembered my Outback fantasy with you and decided I can't pass judgements.
Any who, I expect to be showered with roses apon my arrival
How about beer and nachos?
A fine substitute!
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