why is it that everytime a half black man enters something boring, it suddenly becomes sexy to people? golf? the presidency?
There's a pair of socks on the bar. No-one's questioned this.
how did the keg end up in the top bunk?
cassie wtf are you alive??! no one has seen you for like seven hours whereeee did you go
IS IT POSSIBLE FOR A GUY TO NOT HAVE BALLS
Shitshow foam night was such a success
I found a half-finished mass text from my California weekend that said "things I want to rape: you, things, stuff, and le"
Can't find our DD
He's backstage giving the strippers foot massages.They kidnapped him the moment he walked thru the door.
It's meant to be, Cynthia. You, him, and your developed breasts are meant for each other.
Owwwww. Yeah. I can barely move unless Im high on vicodin. We are bad at drinking/balancing. We will be the first to break hips and have to go into a home.
How exactly does one go about seducing an older, possibly blind gentleman?
why am i naked
you took off your clothes at the party and some guy took them home
Do you know anyone else that comes home with unexplainable injuries as many nights a week as we do?
I feel like I got run over by a steamroller made of cigarettes and booze driven by all of the men I've slept with.
Goal: finish my bio assignment before the Xanax kicks in.
well i can officially check "have sex in a prius" off my bucket list...
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