margs and chips and queso make the world go round
well and inertia
I just had unprotected sex with a stranger. but i did him wearing nothing but my pearls. so its classy.
im walking the streets of bville with a bag of cat food..looking for my car. i dont ever want to turn 21 again.
I just woke up in a puddle of boob sweat. Definitely time to consider a reduction.
I just woke up at my desk with "To Whommmmmmmmm" typed on a letter. I have no memory of waking up, getting dressed or driving in.
i wish i could shrink down to the size of his dick so i could just thank it in person.
Happiness for him is a different happiness than you can supply cuz you have life standards, morals and goals that dont include the bar or beer everynight.
Will that be creepy to wake him up at midnight with my tongue all over his body??
Buy Actually if the police need to find my body I'm on an air mattress in an apartment near a McDonald's that's all I see out dat Window
Last night was a "wash hands with dog shampoo" kind of night
she paid $15 and a box of cheerios for their acid
Whoever said it shouldn't take a man to make you happy clearly wasn't having sex everyday.
EVERYBODY CALM YOUR SHIT
You can't say that. Only if you have peed on the side of the highway in daylight while signing Christmas songs can you say that.
Never thought I’d use my computer science degree for teledildonics, but here I am
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