i hate sounding clingy, but i just wanted to verify i wasn't an asshole in your mind
How come twittering sounds sexual?
Because of Bambi.
My e-date is really photogenic. Real-life not so much
Shaq going to Cleveland; Vince Carter to the Magic; Michael Jackson, Farrah Fawcett, and Ed McMahon die.... ARMAGEDDON IS UPON US!!!!!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I drank mimosas and played bocce ball in the middle of finals week...now i know how Comm majors feel all the time.
He held me the entire night. Not endearing kind of way. Like kidnapping or held hostage kind of way.
We just found a knife wedged in between the cushions on the couch you guys fucked on...why is this?
But on the up side she uprooted a whole peony plant from the hotel downtown and said, "I brought you flowers"
So drunk. Washed my hair un pancheros sink cus I was so hot.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What's standard gratutity for someone having a miscarriage on stage at a strip club? It's important.
The guy I woke up with is wearing the same nailpolish as me...I need to stop drinking
Is the mullet a good, great, or horrible idea before we leave for college
We gotta locate my vibrators and get them stashed away STAT
thanks for passing me through your vagina 20 years ago today. your the best
They tried to get you to drink water and all you kept shouting was, "NO MORE LIQUIDS OF *ANY* KIND."
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