is it odd that your cat looks tougher than you?
Remember, sex is not sex til both people cross the finish line. Until then, it is just a favor.
All I remember is doing a naked tuck and roll of your bed.
Oh wow. Was walking and just saw her in the pool, fully clothed, ranting on an alligator float. I guess i should go get her before security gets here.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I danced on the street to dubstep on a boombox for an hour with a lesbian single mother.
There's a picture of you on facebook laying in the street with 3 cops standing over you after you faceplanted off that guy's shoulders.
Is that what happened to my face?!
Would your heart desire to drink copious amounts of alcohol tonight?
possibly one of my favorite moments was wiping it off your nose after you high fived a bouncer
I woke up this morning with a text from my mom as to why the hell random people were showing up at the house. Turns out nobody came to our house party because I gave them my old address, fuck pre-partying for real
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
In case you're wondering what I'm doing, I'll be banging an 18 year old this weekend. Repeatedly.
He was feeling me up but acting like he was asleep. Like WTF does that mean??
He's bringing a lesbian pretending to be his girlfriend to family Christmas. I can not wait to see how this goes.
If you're going to be single forever, you should try the quesalupas at Taco Bell.
His name was toto. That should have been my red flag
He punched me in the face while giving him road head, because he was driving stick. I shit you not.
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