you washed your face with toilet water last night.. i tried to stop you but you wouldn't have it.
OMG THIS GUYS LICENSE PLATE IS GETTNHRWET
I'm drinking margaritas out of a soup mug, of course I'm going to get wasted
How do you get a 7 on a pregnancy test?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No. I do not want to discuss your lesbian tendencies with my sister.
She still started it.
There are pictures of you on the shoulders of some old guy dressed as borat
You'd be amazed at how difficult it is to find pics of the helicopter dick
I am very proud of your internet skills
You were sitting in the tub, clothed, squirting my KY all over yourself. You said "it's warm." then passed out.
Baked and hanging out with Al from Home Improvement's son. You can't make this shit up. Tuh-rippin balls
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't feel bad about fucking old guys. That's what I want. It's what I likeeeeee.
Locals got pissed I was talking to the barmaid. Tried to tell me that they keep all the good beer at "a Soho walkup" Google saved me
I named my Roomba after my pot dealer. I have a problem, don't i?
Fuck it. I'm going for it. You're only young once, right?
You've been saying that for 5 years now. Let me know when the novelty wears off.
So you were shitfaced and stole a fucking kayak?
If hypothetically I needed to puke on the bus... how would I go about doing this.
Randomize