:( I miss blowjobs.
This is probably the strangest conversational segue we've ever had.
I just ran into the couch, vagina first.
I hope you got dinner out of it
Thanksgiving. A stoners favorite holiday
Lots of explosions. Minor nudity. Full penetration and lots of tuxedos.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yah, I definitely wouldn't wanna be fingered with a fake arm...
It's a big world.....someone has to fuck it.
we got plastered, then made lists of anything thats ever been in our vaginas
I know. Brad is upset because he was lower on the list than "that carrot stick"
Yes, I did know where her mouth had been, but frankly I think it was a lesson you needed to learn.
well.. I tried flushing my sandals down the toilet
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He really thought ahead and just left the tequila in the mail box for late night pickup. Best. Friend. Ever.
when your 30 and im 37 and we're lonely and single, lets make a pact to murder each other.
Can I come over? I respect you, but I want disrespectful things to happen
If anyone wants to ring in the new year with gluttony and yoga pants, let me know. As soon as it becomes a socially acceptable hour to drink margaritas, I'm gonna go down on a chimichanga.
he's been dating her for 18 months and cheating on her with me for 16. if that's not commitment, i don't know what is.
I hit an all time low we ran out of coke and I met up with my dealer at 8 in the morning for a re-up. great customer service though.
Randomize