Also, the republican called me again last night. He called me dumb and ugly then begged to come over. Gosh... he knows how to make me want him...
I coulnt tell if he was cumming or if I was throwing up
how bad would it be if i made his twitter my home page?
Is he smart?
Why would i know that. That would deal with the top half of his body. I only deal with the bottom half.
In case you were wondering, my scare crow is wearing your outfit from last night.
I think I need to stop sleeping with him. Sex with him is just a reminder of the mediocrity of the rest of my life.
The cops walked in to class and arrested 2 guys for possession.
Would you even take no as an answer? I have a feeling you see it more as a challenge.
Please tell me how I go from a guy with a coke problem to a cop. My own life doesn't even make sense to me anymore
I made $130 by ordering two pizzas and charging them $10 a slice. If they weren't so stoned they might have realized they could have just ordered another pizza for $20.
I gave them the 'I used to fuck your son' discount.
Well I just put wine in my tea
Dude, you spit in your shirt pocket saying "I'm saving it for later" then dove head first into the pyramid of beer cans we set up.
I hooked up with a guy that had a beard last night felt like I was building a fucken log cabin
wish he had known he had poison ivy on his cock beforehand... Is calamine okay to put on your vag?..
Randomize
