OK...I gotta go get strawberry short cake cakes and knee pads
wanna hang out tonight and remember it?
we managed to turn Dream Phone into a drinking game. don't hate.
I can't right now...you know Sunday night is whn I get drunk and do laundry.
i think i figured out where our problem might have started...when we poured more tequila on top of out margaritas to melt the ice bc they were too cold
hahaha or putting rum in the bbq sauce?
Well besides you comparing him to your dead cat, I'd say it was fine.
For the amount of money I just spent on my dogs toe, I could have fucked the entire B squad at a low end strip club.
U offered to motor boat her and it somehow turned into u two going on a sunset cruise in Newport. At 3am.
I shit you not ... they just advertised a recruiting service for strippers at this concert.
For the sake of my mom, I can't sleep with two guys with the same name. She has a hard enough time keeping up as it is
I think I'm crying more because after all these years he never learned to spell you or use a comma properly from me
But in defense of this shit summer we've had, I totally perfected my shotgunning skills. I have achieved my summer goal.
Keep two things coming: nudes and puppy pictures
I flashed my boobs, shit my pants, and kissed the wrong twin. I'm on a roll you don't want in on.
my face feels like mints and my body feels like tingles
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