Is it possible to make a milkshake in a martini shaker or am I gonna need a blender?
I honestly get shocked all over again every time I pull his pants down. It's one of those feelings you never get tired of.
He told me the hand job I gave him this morning was "lovely".
My knee is bleeding. This cheeseburger is the 3rd thing I made out with today and I think I got a job with the ducks. Catalina is poppin
We shall study the pictures later and see if his penis is worth my time.
There's a homeless man outside the bar. I have a toothbrush and toothpaste in my car. I think i'm going to give them to him. And they said drinking is bad.
You're so thoughtful.
I will suppress my appetite by doing shots then passing out
The gay is strong with you! You're more concerned about my outfit than my safety.
Apparently she has a 10 week old kid, which would explain the hallway effect I was feeling.
Man my junk looks like a mangled grapefruit right now, this shit sucks.
The original plan involved fireworks and a lot more dildos but the new one is still okay.
Now all I want to do is stay up, drink wine, and look at dragons.
Bring me your tired, your weary, your buffalo chicken dip
I went to smoke a bowl and realized that my lighter is out and there's still frozen blueberries in my bong... I need to reevaluate my life...
It's so weird fucking this kids aunt then going to the gym with him everyday, but my sick minded self loves it.
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