She said if it slipped out one more time she was going to duct tape it in her vagina
Just found a glow stick inside of my vagina..
With the amount of traffic your vagina gets, it was only a matter of time before someone threw a rave there.
Blowing lines off from the book where the wild things are... bad babysitter?
She said you were bangin on the counters of McDonalds singing "These Eyes" at 4am
she likes to give head while listening to britney spears, getting blown by a girl with headphones on is a nice level of separation
Saw an eatery called Rusty Taco. That sooo could be me.
Because the last time i saw or spoke to him he came all over me in a hammock.
I just asked the contractor building my house what it would cost to put a garbage disposal in all the shower drains...there was a lot of judging going on.
He's sobering up. It was really bad for like 45 minutes. He cried while telling me how he pictured us eating hotdogs on the beach together.
What was your penis's nickname in high school? Also, what was it's theme song?
Its a bummer that corporate america doesn't believe in $2 u call its on a Sunday night
the last thing i remember saying is "hope you like body hair"
I puked in my fridge last night while I was trying to get water
You're cock blocking me from my own boyfriend. What kind of shit is that?
I am going to go Miley Cyrus crazy if I don't get sex soon
Headline in the alligator: young zeta goes berserk after lack of sex and is found naked swinging from wrecking ball on university ave, refuses to get down until sex partner is found
Randomize
