the roller ball on my blackberry is the closest i've come to touching a clit in 2 years.
Its a sad when the highlight of your day is flicking a booger and actually getting it to stick to your computer monitor.
so for future reference,at what point did you feel like a line had been crossed?
You and I should start a club for people who woke up on outside on a bench with no idea how they got there.
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watching hot guy on train scrolling with his blackberry's track ball... o to be that track ball...
tell me there's a reason my bed smells like paint thinner
Day 1 of "Death of a Liver" weekend complete. It came with flashbacks of horrible mistakes I made due to alcohol. I'm excited for how Sunday is going to turn out.
Was it just me or did you also find it awkward when "glad you came" started playing on pandora right after you finished?
He challenged me to a drink off, I couldn't just say no. It was a matter of pride really.
And as he was cursing your name from the bathroom you were ordering yourself another drink on his tab. The poor bastard had no clue you were a pro drunk
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I think tonight's gonna be the night I wear a go pro while trippin on acid
Odd start to the day - the FBI just showed up at my apartment.
I may have taken the entire adderall. I FEEL LIKE THE FUCKIN HULK. I can't stop cleaning and organizing and doing the clean things
There's hope in those eyes, for a better tomorrow or more cocaine, we may never know, but there's hope.
Hey do u remember the time we used my mascara wand as a drink stirer?
She asked me if I could do that to her every single time. I said nope. sometimes it's better.
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