we're taking a shot everytime we receive a "Happy Thanksgiving!!!!!" mass text. up to 7 since 10am. God help us.
just bought a $25 eighth from a chick who has a kid. i'm helping my community out right?
She's dressed as Musafa. How could this not be a good idea?
I'don't know who your are but its that time a day. Drunk it up. Did you buy a House for goundhogs days?
Dude that musta been some handjob last night. The sound of her pandora bracelet kept waking me up
That combination of brocholi bacon eggs cheese ketchup and pasta would have been a revaltion had you not thrown up on the stove and put out the pilot light
well I think it'll pretty much be gone by Saturday. On a scale of 1- Snooki's unborn child how much do periods freak you out?
My going away gift was all of them dancing around with solo cups on their dick and balls...these are my friends
Remember when you fed me goldfish while I was -inside- of someone?
I need to quit being a slut. It's to the point that I got my period today and automatically I Believe I Can Fly popped into my head.
He kept telling me that it stood for Sex Utility Vehicle
She was doing hand motions and used straws from drinks like those airport light batons to have me back my "747 jumbo dick" towards you.
Next time I pee on a car, I'll text you.
I'm a little concerned about right now. You showed up at my house soaking wet, drunk with a bag of ham and 2 liter of Dr. Pepper, and you refused to tell me where you got the ham until I gave you some more liquor.
When you wake up and wonder why your bleeding and it feels like you jumped into a ceiling fan, dont worry. Ill explain it all when I wake up.
Randomize
