Why is it people are always in costumes on Cheaters these days? Joe Greco literally just said, "It appears they get chased by a chicken with a chainsaw." WTF?
he's a nude model. what could you have done to make him feel awkward??
They have an open bar at this baby shower. I was born to be Cuban.
It's safe to say that our attempt at trying to fuck in the grand Sierra elevator was a bad idea.
You told the entire McDonalds staff that I was a whore and that you didn't want your french fries cooked.
This from the guy I found eating salad out of a pot lid in his boxers on his porch last night.
Hurry up. Some creepy guy with a "God is vengeful" flyer is asking where I wanna go most today. I think he's going to chop me into pieces.
There's a dead squirrel in the freezer. Is that what you stopped to get out of the road last night?
Do you have any pix of it limp? I wanna see the metamorphosis, like a cock caterpillar turning into a giant beautiful cock butterfly!
dude she got out of bed and definitely took a shit then checked her stomach out in the mirror and whispered "well that probably took off five pounds"
"Where are you? Where are my keys? What is this guys name again? Why am I wearing two pairs of your pants?"
You couldn't even walk but you came into the kitchen with the funnel and begged me to put beer in it
I'm a terrible person when I drink. I went from fine to not making any sense and yelling about cheese in like 30 seconds.
He's making me do the dishes for the next month and half because I shit in the bath tub...
He’s perfect! He listens to Genesis during sex and has a VW bus!
You really are from the panhandle, aren’t you?
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