But never have I ever had sex with a dirty talker before, so it was something else, to say the least. I signed up to get laid, not play Penthouse Mad Libs.
They have edible shot glasses at target.
There really is a God.
Now they're talking about doing whiskey shots since they're flipping the turkey over. You might need to drive me home.
Almost propositioned sex in exchange for a study guide for my final tomorrow.
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Even the bar was yelling boobs, so of course the shirt came off
I haven't gotten it in awhile but since spring break is next week I'm willing to have a pregnancy scare if it means no bleeding through the suit
Yeah wouldn't want it to interfere with beach sex. Nothing should interfere with beach sex
Oh, fuck yeah. I swear I came with every bite. Not even joking. Messiest meal ever.
Wow, thanks for ruining pizza for me. I didn't think it was possible.
Can I borrow you for, like, thirty minutes so you can lay on one boob and rub the other until I fall asleep?
I don't know his last name, but he's in phone as Pat the conqueror.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Speaking of mom and dad and Halloween... Mom bought a size small slutty nurse outfit last night. So yeah, they're getting hammered
I want to sit on top of her nipple mountains and reenact the Ricola commercial.
I blame everything on you. My broken heart, my fucked up liver and my twisted mind.
When she's hammered the amount of alliteration that comes out of her mouth is amazing.
That awkward moment when you were so fucking drunk lastnight that you and your fuck buddy wake up wearing eachother's clothing covered in hot cheetos with his cat curled up between your heads meowing. Thought you'd appreciate this moment with me.
she gave me a ride on the back of her motor scooter and i swooned so hard
omg it's like all of your grease 2 fantasies come true i'm so happy for you
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