Pretty sure I only gave out my other # though. You know, 777 777-7777
Hahaha. So was it a Freudian slip, or wishful thinking? ;)
Could be either seeing as you're in my phone as "3rd bar" and I couldn't pick you outta a line up.
I'm sitting by the window waiting for the sun to go down so that I can start drinking.
I think "I actually like giving blow jobs better" qualifies her as a keeper
Her brother is definitely not gay. I hooked up with him when she was sleeping.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Like lay upon bear skin rugs, drink brandy and reminisce of the yesteryear's before a majestic fire place? Because those are my plans.
Was last night real? Did I lick your forehead while you laid in between my legs while we laid next to your boyfriend?
I'm not a home wrecker but if one more married man with a yacht asks me to go scuba diving I'm NOT saying no
ive cried into many a lonely burritos..
Also was told that I was her "third favourite booty call" - I'm taking this a good thing right?
It's a podium place so yeah...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like you guys are talking about real things and have real problems and I'm just over here like 'should I take muscle relaxers or get drunk tonight?'
With a breakfast like weed and a fun size twix before a dentist appointment you can see exactly how I handle being an adult
I've been there a week.. I'd rather all my coworkers not know that I'm already sleeping with my boss.
I turned off my domesticated goddess switch over 2 years ago and idk how to turn it back on. So in the mean time I'll dodge this gf bullet and eat free steak for as long as possible
How do you feel about a threesome?
Will you be there?
I'm the one asking!
Just because I also want a blowjob doesn't mean I don't want to just see you too.
Randomize