Just donated money to a kid for her softball team.
Obviously I'm trying to futher our next generation of lesbians. I may be hitting on her at the gay bar in ten years...
we just ordered 30 dollars worth of french fries...whats wrong with us?
Pregaming class all semester has made this final review session more like my introduction to the topic.
Wise words from the guy who drunkenly chipped his teeth on the sidewalk
Crosswalk actually
I got my project done and a booty call in all before 1am. I'm a professional college kid.
Also, nothing screams "don't talk to me because I'm unstable" like walking around eating cookie dough out of the package.
We found you facedown on his couch in a pile of cheerios, with only one shoe on. Dude you said you were staying in last night.
so i ran into nick. i may be more gay than anticipated
No more chicken and waffles served by drag queens at 2 AM. :(
I'm pretty sure my munchies are the only reason Good and Plenty is still around
I PUT IT IN THE UNIVERSE THAT I WANTED TO STAB HIM AND THEN SOMEONE DID! KARMA IS A BITCH AND SHE IS BEAUTIFUL!
Did my dad just see you doing a walk of shame?
Yup I waved.
I’m going to cut back. New Year, New Me
I would never wish less dick on anyone but do what you gotta do
I'm so drunk I forgot what to do to go pee.
The party pretty much ended once she shit on the couch
Randomize
