I'm a grown ass woman and I'm sitting in bed eating pizza at 4:30 a.m. BFD, right?
6 figure salary? he just got a little cuter.
We were hooking up, both of us naked. She starts putting her clothes back on and says, "I have to go to the bathroom." I reply, "No you don't, you're leaving." Without hesitation she looks at me and says, "Yeah."
I don't think the TSA agent thought getting iced while searching my bag was as funny as I did.
Europeans suck. I just gave him head and somehow i am the one paying for the coffee
He googled the address of the bar, then sent me a text saying "6.3 miles. Too far. :( Apparently I am only worth a 5 mile radius.
tequilla shots with my grandparents? christmas visiting just got so much better
Hate to say it and even though I definitely have a biased opinion but I'm surprised your not, sleeping with anyone else. Good personality, charisma and amazing in the sack.
Feel free to use me as a reference.
I seem to have forgotten that I am wearing a one piece bathing suit under my clothes
ARE YOU THINKING VAGINA THEMED RESTAURANT
I just want to be able to run around naked and eat grass with no judgments and have people feed me and expect me to sleep all the time.
I have someone saved in my phone as "This Hoe Ain'tit' Loyal" and I'm missing my superman boxers. Explain.
Timehop reminded me that 4 years ago today I helped a one armed man do the YMCA by being his other arm.
I will read books by day and do guys by night. A mental and physical enlightenment, if you will.
Tonight’s your last chance for a danger free blowjob.
Randomize
