in spanish class. the girl next to me asked what Galapagos were. i told her they were islands. now she thinks Galapagos means islands in spanish
he keeps his weed in a birkenstock shoe box. its like, we get it, youre from oregon.
Is it bad when your hot neighbor is crying on her porch, and your 2nd thought is "maybe her boyfriend cheated on her and she'll want to fuck me for revenge sex?"
Perfectly normal.
I still can't believe he turned down that threesome with us in central park. He must be really committed.
If Dave says he's going to have sex with her, he's going to fuck her retarded and turn her crazy. So run.
She is larger then a hippo. You could cut her open in the middle of a blizzard and crawl in like Luke skywalker. Throw a couch and a tv in there and you're set
Sorry I need more motivation then McDonalds and mojitos.
Guess who just got a Christian Beliefs class to seriously discuss the spiritual implications of dolphin rape?
These are all good points. But, I think your under estimating what it's like to be held upside down for a standing 69
I'm so glad we both made out with him though. I feel like that really brought us together
I just bought us acid. I'm like the drug tooth fairy. Get ready to wake up with a sweattart of acid under your pillow.
She said, after pronouncing how sober she was, and I quote 'Take this bag, it's so heavy it's like 500 degrees! Wait, is it time to go? Can I run? I think I can run!' Then she ran away.
Life update - currently drunk off my ass in the yoga room of SFO at 5:30 in the morning.
this place is dumb. no one understands my Sunday morning alcoholism here.
Tell him that his phone is taped to the dog's stomach. Stop trying to call it because it makes him scared.
Randomize