Spider just rapelled from her vag rethinking online dating.
so i wake up and the chick who i had sex last night left her phone number. next to the number was a broken condom. should i call?
MCAT status: Day 64, no longer can remember what sex is like.
Sometimes one must go to great lengths and make great sacrifices to get drunk. I willingly accept the challenge.
FYI I'm about to upload a vid of you to facebook of you screaming "SNACK ATTACK" and throwing cheetos at everyone playing pong...
lets just use each other and get past this awkward stage. forget my name.
Meeting girls and telling em you have no hair on your calves is not an acceptable pick up line
I got woken up by a construction worker, turns out I was laying in a hallway, naked and wrapped in a matress pad. To answer your question no, I did not study for this test I got David Hasselhoff drunk
I have a rage boner right now. An actual erection brought on by the amount of sheer hatred I have towards nationwide.
I think we might have a drinking problem when the ASU kids called us crazy
No one made them take a shot with us at the 12 hour mark. That's their bad
walked into my roommates bathroom to her throwing up a quesadilla while singing come on skinny taco
I got with him in my watermelon costume so ya you owe me $1
Was the picture of her twerking on a fake plant sufficient?
I just want to sit in my tub, drugged out of my mind, and watch the green lantern cartoon while the world as we know it ceases to exist outside my bathroom door, Okay? Is that REALLY too much to ask?
Because of you I'm damaged goods. I'm a fucking soup can and you dropped me.
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