Is there a tactful way for me to ask a girl to let me know when she gets her period?
it was like getting a handjob from mrs. butterworth
I'm watching Terminator eating a jar of marshmallow fluff. Trust me, you are not fat.
i could have sworn she did an overextended split with her legs over her head but now i think it was just the drugs
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I elbow dropped a bag of ice to break it so we could make margaritas. I bled everywhere. Be proud.
She still cant shoot whiskey?
Im having serious doubts about this relationship
I will not fill you in on the details until we get back, so do not ask. I got peed on by the girl I was hooking up with last night.
No exaggeration. At the gas station she handed me the mop from over the counter and told me that's my last drink of the night
I would love a rich wife. Then I would be like a gym teacher or some shit. Bigfoot hunter maybe.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Her one night stand followed us to mass. This is too funny for real life.
I was telling everyone at the frat that they had to try the "fantastic refreshment" that was everclear, vodka and country time
You woke us up at 9:15 am still in your toga from last night saying "welcome to my house party...party". You had already filled up the pong cups with yaager/fireball and ordered a chicken platter... Who even delivered that that early???
During my first week as an adjunct prof, I played a fiercely fought game of squash with a law student and we wound up having hot, sweaty, angry sex right on the floor of the court. She is either the best or worst thing to happen to my academic career. Will let you know.
Hope you’re getting action boo.
Definitely no. I woke up next to a bag of McDonald's.
Let's just say I peed the bed last night, and I wasn't in it alone. Whoooops
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